“Adolescence is a period of rapid changes.  Between the ages of 12 and 17,
for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years.”  ~ Parent Unknown




 

SCORPIO

October 24 to November 22


“I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.”

--Woody Allen




No one ever has to ask if there’s a Scorpio teen in the house. Even if you can’t see them, you can feel their presence. They’re moody, magnetic, penetrating, possessive, passionate – and then they get out of bed!  Your teen’s deep sensitivity permeates the household.  It’s always present, ready to love intensely, or to hate intensely. Neither emotion is necessarily expressed in words, because Scorpios – ruled by both Mars and the dark planet, Pluto – rarely bring their feelings into the open.


A sign this complex deserves its three powerful astrological symbols: the scorpion, representing the unevolved self, known to sting himself to death rather than give up the pleasure of stinging; the eagle that flies higher than any other bird, and the phoenix rising from the ashes of its old self. That’s why, no matter how extreme or self-destructive this teen’s behavior can be (and it can be a 10 on the Richter scale), they should never be given up as hopeless, because they are never helpless. Scorpios have the formidable power and miraculous ability – without smoke or mirrors -- to resurrect themselves.


Hungry for life . . .

The above astrological symbols may reaffirm what you already know: your teen feeds off an intensity that leaves him or her just a little bit hungry; always looking for new mental challenges, always seeking more emotional depth. It’s the excavation of secret information they love, and the dark, mysterious side of human nature that fascinates them. These yearnings often surface in a Scorpio teen’s love of mystery novels and addiction to Stephen King’s dark imaginings.


Scorpio’s need to form a union with something outside of themselves, is also profound. You might notice a fascination with spiritual and metaphysical realms. Or the occult, bringing interests from dimensions definitely outside your zip code! As your teen matures, you’ll notice a growing desire to form a union with someone outside of themselves as well.  After all, what’s more mysterious, intense, dark, deep and ultimately unfathomable than sex?


Astro-psychologist, Glenn Perry, says “ Scorpio represents the sex drive, pure and simple.”


And so, it’s to be expected that teens of this water sign – silent and deep -- are never simple and often far from pure.


Forbidden fantasy . . .

So much of a teen’s life is ruled by fantasy. It’s delivered directly and in stereophonic sound from the top fantasy makers – the media. Teens are implored to “ please just wait” by parents and warned to “ be celibate until marriage” by religious leaders. All the while messages from sitcoms, music videos and commercials scream, “ What are you waiting for?”


But how much can we blame the media for U.S. teen levels of pregnancy, childbirth, abortion and sexually transmitted diseases, which are the highest of all industrialized nation? Do the media simply reflect back the sexual values of our society? Or simply exploit them? Or both?


Most people wait until they’re old enough to release their sexual energy at a socially acceptable time; usually after puberty and (hopefully) before senility. At one end of the sexual spectrum is the adult who doesn’t release their sexual energy at all, but sublimates it into corporate power, political campaigning, or pulpit proselytizing (disclaimer: Testosterone Titans Ted Turner, Bill Clinton and Jim Baker are definite exceptions!) However, because of Scorpio’s desire to dissolve in deep intimacy with another -- and fascination with anything sexually taboo -- they’re usually found gleefully playing doctor at the opposite end of the spectrum. The urge for sexual release is ever-present, like that $100 bill in your pocket pleading, “spend me!”


The moth to the flame . . .

As the sign that rules the 8th house of sex in the zodiac, and the generative system in the body, Scorpio’s sexual imagination is on a 24-hour alert. They’re erotic and hypnotic creatures who strongly affect the opposite sex. So how can parents assure they’ll have a semblance of maturity before experiencing sex? Short of forcing them to wear braces with matching headgear, the options are limited.


Telling these sexual teens not to have sex is like convincing naturalists that fish breathe better on a golf course. There are campaigns to exercise self-control in drinking and campaigns to “ just say no” to drugs -- but what about sex? Can we really convince teens to sexually cool off and back off with sexual abstinence programs?


Fighting Mother Nature . . .  

Science tells us the sex drive is primitive and located on the brain stem. In the frontal cortex of the brain are located reason, choice, intelligence and everything we parents hope will help teens to exercise self-discipline. However, when sexual desire arises, the primitive brain overrides choice and reason. Not always. Not forever. But when those drives are just being awakened in a teen, the abstinence program guaranteed to work has yet to be invented.


Happily, there are exceptional exceptions to the rule. In the chapter on Gemini I talk about a vital type of birth control: The powerful feeling-in-control birth control. Your teen is one of the few who, when motivated, can actually manifest the will not to follow every sexual impulse. It’s a display of Scorpio self-control at its most formidable.


(This excerpt from The Scorpio Teen, is  followed by the chapter: “Power To Parents” which lets you find your own Moon sign, and learn how to better nurture and communicate with your teen.)