HEALING THE HURT IN LOVE

Imagine this scenario: you just had a major argument with your lover. He’s begging for forgiveness and you’re not giving an inch. Communication is zero. What do you say next? What should you never say? 

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Communication is the biggest stumbling block on the uphill climb to a great relationship. Naturally, it’s easy to communicate when times are Kodak perfect, but when hurt raises its wounded head, most of us would rather die (and often lie) than admit how crushed we feel.  Pride gets in the way. Our deepest feelings are never expressed.  But that doesn’t have to happen. Astrology can guide us towards saying the right thing, in the right way . . . to make everything right again.

 

ARIES

Aggressive Mars has blessed you with a mega dose of self-confidence, and you won’t need to wait for your lover to speak first. You’re not afraid of saying what’s on your mind, but your quick temper often stops you from hearing your partner’s point of view (or hearing his or her red hot howl as your anger hits home.) So wait until you cool down before trying to communicate. Your partner probably loves how direct you are  -- and if you temper your temper with tact (not always your strong point) you should be able to communicate without having to call 911. The lesson for you Aries is: keep your cool and keep your lover.

 

TAURUS

When you have an argument Taurus, the trauma to your secure world registers 9.5 on the Richter Scale. Just don’t retreat into a stubborn position where your angry silence becomes deafening. Think of it this way: your relationship may be wounded, but unless you respond to your lover’s attempts to talk, it may not survive! When pride stops you from speaking, begin communicating by simply slipping your hand into his or hers. Your ruling planet, loving Venus, will do the rest. This is the kind of positive silence that can heal any hurt. Then practice this lesson Taurus: have the courage to speak what’s in your heart.

 

GEMINI

The argument was over an hour ago Gemini, and you’re still talking as fast as you can!  Mercury, the planet of communication, makes words your ally, but often they shoot off your tongue with the impact of 45 caliber bullets. Your problem is not slowing down long enough to think things through before speaking, or to really listen to your lover. Wit and charm are your saving grace, so why not use them to bridge the gap that divides you?  Don’t give in to sarcasm, just use gentle humor to ease the tension and let your lover know that you want to communicate. The lesson for you Gemini is: remember that love is a two-way speak.

 

CANCER

Your astrological symbol is the Crab and during an argument you’re likely to crawl into your shell and disappear. Yes, we know how much you fear rejection, but that can make communicating with you almost impossible without a loudspeaker. When you do talk, resist playing the victim because that will only push your lover farther away. Your ruling planet the Moon, gives you the gift of empathy, so use this unique ability to tune into someone else’s feelings. Once you feel your partner’s hurt along with your own, it will open your heart to communication. The lesson for you Cancer is: use your sensitivity and not your sensitiveness.

 

LEO

When a lover hurts your pride, one can almost hear the lion dangerously swishing its tail, ready to attack. You want a partner who will make you feel loved, respected and never bruise your ego. But even the best relationships often fall flat on a slip of the tongue. So instead of hiding behind ego defenses of rationalizations, or even flat out denial, try some honest communication. The more icy cold you feel, the more you should let your ruling Sun warm your heart. Then you will be your true self: strong enough to show regret, generous with emotions and with forgiveness.  The lesson for you Leo is: you’ll look fantastic in humility – wear it with pride.


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